The Anchor and The Harbour
Adventure isn't simply doing what scares you. It's about doing something that matters to you, even though it might scare you.
What does the word 'adventure' bring to mind for you?
In 2020 we explored this theme for the first time. It seemed like a perfect moment for it as the world entered a new reality under Covid.
We have all had to adapt and adjust to different shifts over the past two years. And as I was reflecting on responses to the recent 'Adventure' survey, it struck me that a word we explored back then ('Anchor'), would be worth returning to again this year.
Anchors and Harbours
"An anchor keeps a vessel at bay, planted in the harbour, unable to explore the freedom of the sea” - The Minimalists
The image of anchors is interesting to consider in the context of adventure. The things and places to which we are anchored really matter when it comes to building a life that reflects the visions, values, and desires we have for our lives.
I have been reflecting on this recently, and wonder if there is a difference between the anchors and the things to which we BECOME anchored. The Minimalists go on to say, "we discovered big anchors (debt, bad relationships, etc.) and small anchors (superfluous bills, material possessions, etc.) and in time we eliminated the vast majority of those anchors, one by one."
Are the "big anchors" actually harbours (or places we get anchored TO)? With the anchors being the things that keep us there, such as our beliefs, habits, and actions.
If we don't look at the anchors that keep us tethered to things we don't want, we may just replace one undesirable destination with another.
This is something I'm excited to explore, so that we might identify the difference between healthy and unhealthy anchors. And also think about the anchors we need to play with in order to find a sense of safety and stability in the most meaningful places.
An Introduction to Confidence | February 2022
Confidence 2022 | You Can't Bottle It
What does the word 'confidence' bring to mind for you?
Maybe it's something you wish you had more of. Perhaps a certain person or type of person pops into your head. Someone you associate with having confidence (or a particular perception of confidence).
We are diving into some of the many aspects of the weird and wonderful theme of confidence over the next few weeks inside The Haven. And I'd love to invite you to be part of this exploration.
We're kicking off as usual with a theme discussion.
I caught up with Kendra a while back and we had a chat about our own perceptions of confidence, what it means for us, and the role it plays in our creativity and how we share ourselves and our work with the world.
Confidence is such a huge topic that is never far from the lips when we think about what we believe we need more of in order to face challenges and achieve goals. But as we discuss in our conversation, there is often so much more to confidence than meets the eye.
We chat about:
- Ways the story we believed about our natural temperament growing up informs and reinforces our relationship with self-confidence (or a lack thereof) - especially when introversion and sensitivity are judged as social deficiencies
- The differences between a perception of confidence and genuine deep inner confidence
- Different types of confidence and how confidence in people, things, and processes, might be a way towards more self-confidence
- How a sign of deep self-confidence is seen in the ability to share insecurities and aspects of life about which you are not confident (a paradox?)
- Why self-confidence is not something we possess, but rather something that develops and grows over time (and what we might do to nurture the conditions for this to happen)
- Why discomfort with self-promotion is NOT a lack of confidence, but a preference that we can become aware of when engaging with others (why do we recoil?)
- The difference between being confident in your creative work and confident in your right to do creative work (and why you only need the latter to get going)
- The impact of feedback on confidence when it comes to building a creative practice (and how receiving bad feedback is far more damaging than receiving none at all)
- What constitutes good feedback, and how we can develop the confidence to ask for it (and give it to others)
- How feedback is a partnership and the ways we receive, process, and mine/release solicited criticism
- The importance of "sleeping on it" when it comes to processing feedback with implications
- And many other things...
Notes on Your Notes (The Hannah Episodes)
An Introduction to Strength | January 2022
Strength 2022 | Keep The Core Burning
January is the month of 'Strength' in The Haven. Kendra and I had a chat about it to get us started.
It's always interesting to explore the idea of strength in relation to sensitivity, gentleness, and creativity.
Strength is a word loaded with meaning for each of us, but we are looking at it as a thing's capacity to endure stress, strain, or tension, without disintegrating.
This month we will be thinking about ways to reinforce and strengthen our relationship with the things that matter to us. We will also explore how to nurture strength in the face of criticism and rejection. And how to do this without desensitising ourselves to the things that bring joy to life.
In The Conversation We Discuss:
- Integrity and Strength - how strength is an emergent property of the diversity of a thing's parts (aspects working together within an integrated whole)
- Why true strength is underpinned by vulnerability
- The potential harms caused by simplistic and aggressive positivity, especially in relation to nurturing personal strength through awareness and integration of the complex inner web of who we are
- Creativity, Strength, and the Burning Core that helps us build resilience in the face of external feedback, criticism, and rejection
- Sensitivity and Strength - why thick skin is not desirable as we become who we are in a harsh and unrelenting world (and what we might do to 'strengthen' our skin instead)
- Strength Through Social and Creative Connection - how isolation, separation, and disintegration from unprocessed thoughts/feelings like envy and resentment can leave us weak and disempowered